Wednesday
Jan262011

The Economy, Stupid

by Joe Heller

Wednesday
Jan262011

State of the Salmon Address

Seriously, this is all anybody will ever remember about last night:

We live and do business in the information age, but the last major reorganization of the government happened in the age of black and white TV.  There are twelve different agencies that deal with exports. There are at least five different entities that deal with housing policy. Then there’s my favorite example: the Interior Department is in charge of salmon while they’re in fresh water, but the Commerce Department handles them in when they’re in saltwater. And I hear it gets even more complicated once they’re smoked.

Full text here.

Friday
Jan212011

Olbermann Bows Out

Given the recent turmoil, this shouldn’t come as a surprise. MSNBC has a long, storied history of fucking their best talent, so the really surprising thing is that they managed to snag people like Olbermann and Maddow in the first place. I look forward to Keith’s new show, “Hey, Who Wants to Talk about Sports?” airing weekdays on SPIKE.

Saturday
Jan152011

The Very Best of Michael Steele

Taegan Goddard has posted a list of the ten best Michael Steele quotes from his too-short tenure as RNC Chairman. They’re all great, but my favorite is this one:

7. “Our platform is one of the best political documents that’s been written in the last 25 years. Honest Injun on that.” 

— Steele, defending the Republican platform.

Click here for the whole list.

Saturday
Jan152011

The Reason for the Season

By Steve Greenberg.

Saturday
Jan152011

#73. Kinder, Gentler

The latest Red Phone comic is all about achieving civility.

Click here.

Wednesday
Jan122011

Obama's Memorial Speech

This guy is our president.

That’s what I believe, in part because that’s what a child like Christina Taylor Green believed.  Imagine: here was a young girl who was just becoming aware of our democracy; just beginning to understand the obligations of citizenship; just starting to glimpse the fact that someday she too might play a part in shaping her nation’s future.  She had been elected to her student council; she saw public service as something exciting, something hopeful.  She was off to meet her congresswoman, someone she was sure was good and important and might be a role model.  She saw all this through the eyes of a child, undimmed by the cynicism or vitriol that we adults all too often just take for granted.
 
I want us to live up to her expectations.  I want our democracy to be as good as she imagined it.  All of us - we should do everything we can to make sure this country lives up to our children’s expectations.

Full text here.

Wednesday
Jan122011

Sarah Palin's Enduring Narcissism

When a bully is confronted by adults, their usual response is to burst into tears and complain about how unfair it is that they are being blamed for everything. This is the GOP’s favorite tactic, to menace and assault the left until someone objects, then roll around on the floor screaming in outrage.

Think about that as you watch Sarah Palin piss and moan about being victimized by “journalists and pundits.”

Stiff upper lip, Sarah.

There would be no reason to release a video like this unless Sarah Palin intends to run for president. Any other politician would have stopped at decrying the violence in Tucson, not defending their own honor or making the case in defense of violent rhetoric, and they certainly wouldn’t mention winning the previous election. This video is a victory dance that Sarah Palin is doing on the graves of the victims right before her big Presidential announcement.

She has learned nothing from the violence in Arizona, and as usual her ignorance is the thing she is most proud of.

By the way, Fritinancy linked to this explanation of the term “blood libel.” Fascinating choice of words.

Tuesday
Jan112011

The New Stranger Cover

Poor Sarah Palin. Why won’t anybody believe her? She already told you some made-up bullshit. Who are you to judge her? I mean, you’re probably just poor and jealous or something.

Leave her alone!

(via DF)

Tuesday
Jan112011

Bearing Fruit

By Adam Zyglis.

Tuesday
Jan112011

#72. Tucson

The latest Red Phone is all about how Jesus would feel about us if he, you know, existed.

Click here.

Picture of Jesus on the Shroud by El Greco.

Thursday
Jan062011

On a Jet Plane

I’m going to be in Los Angeles for the next few days, so posting is going to depend on a lot of little things. Everything should return to normal next week.

Banana phone.

Tuesday
Jan042011

No Love for 2010

Come on guys, there was a pretty good season of Dexter in there somewhere.

Cartoon by Cam Cardow.

Tuesday
Jan042011

Tucker Walks Back Vick Sentence

Ah, the non-apology apology, how you sustain us all.

You see, Tuck only made that point about a black person’s life being worth 8 to 10 dogs because he was feeling “emotional.” Whereas, conversely, I stand by everything I said about Tuck being a demented little shit-weasel. How do I manage to stay in business?

Here’s Tuck’s response to Hannity’s WTF:

This is what happens when you get too emotional. And look, the bottom line is I’m a dog lover. I’ve had dogs my whole life, we have three of them now, I love them. And I know a lot about what Michael Vick did, what he admitted doing, and I’m not going to get into it Sean, because it’s too upsetting frankly. But if you take some time, anybody who takes some time and looks into how he mistreated these dogs and personally tortured them to death, gets upset. And I, you know, I over spoke. I’m uncomfortable with the death penalty under any circumstances. Of course, I don’t think he should be executed. But I do think what he did is truly appalling.

Tucker then added, “Psyche, you homo,” spun around in his chair for several minutes, and threw spitballs at the camera for the rest of the segment. It was, in a word, surreal.

Tuesday
Jan042011

Obama as Luke Skywalker

Tuesday
Jan042011

Second Opinion

by John Darkow.

Monday
Jan032011

Scalia: "No Penis, No Civil Rights"

You know, sometimes I wonder if I hate Republicans because it is the right thing to do, or just because it is fun. Thank god for Tony Scalia, who reminds us that Republicans really are evil, backward people:

Certainly the Constitution does not require discrimination on the basis of sex. The only issue is whether it prohibits it. It doesn’t. Nobody ever thought that that’s what it meant. Nobody ever voted for that. If the current society wants to outlaw discrimination by sex, hey we have things called legislatures, and they enact things called laws.

Monday
Jan032011

Issa's Real List

What is it with Republicans having names that sound like rejected Tolkien villains? Orrin Hatch, Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney, Strom Thurmond (who was, admittedly, a Democrat back in the 1840s), and Darrell “Wormtongue” Issa.

It’s Issa who appears to be sensing his moment in the grim tome of history right now. He’s recently called Obama “one of the most corrupt presidents in modern times,” and as incoming chair of the House Oversight Committee he’s already got a checklist of issues he wants to hold hearings on. Politico is reporting that they’ve obtained a copy of said list, but I know better. Here’s Darrel Issa’s real list:

1. Make a lot of noise about “big government” even though I am an integral part of that government.

2. Pretend like the years 2001-2009 never happened when referring to the nation’s current problems.

3. Hope nobody discovers my many, many crimes.

4. Prevent Frodo from getting the One Ring back to Mordor. (Important!!!)

Sunday
Jan022011

#71. Two Steps Forward

The latest Red Phone is all about the spirit of competition. Also, we’re welcoming a new character into the fold. Enjoy:

Friday
Dec312010

Happy Ominous New Year